With our high demand, fast paced society it seems moms have more on their plate than ever before.
It used to be that the responsibility fell on the mom to keep the kids clothed, fed, and to make sure they didn’t give their siblings a black eye.
Now, between baseball practice, ballet, play dates, clubs, and outings, moms are up to their necks with time-consuming, and don’t forget stressful, obligations for their kids.
It’s no wonder why it’s a common consensus that being a mom today is harder than it was a generation ago.
Pew Research Center has done extensive research on this topic. Their findings show:
“A national survey by the Pew Research Center, conducted Feb.16-March 14 among 2,020 Americans, finds a widespread belief that today’s parents are not measuring up to the standard that parents set a generation ago.
Fully 70% of the public says it is more difficult to be a mother today than it was 20 or 30 years ago.
More than half of Americans (56%) say that mothers are doing a worse job today than mothers did 20 or 30 years ago.”
So, not only is it harder to be a mom, but it is said that mothers are doing worse than before!
It makes sense if you think about it because moms put way too much on their plate, making it nearly impossible to do everything well. We have chosen quantity over quality.
Rick Hanson Ph.D. wrote in Psychology Today,
“The stress chemistry of your body has gotten jacked up since hurrying, multi-tasking, and feeling pressured trigger essentially the same hormonal and neural mechanisms that helped our ancestors run away from charging lions.”
While we may not have lions, there have been some play dates I’m sure of that some moms have wanted to run from.
This constant trigger of hormones and neural mechanisms is detrimental to the body. We often call this state, stress.
Deborah Khoshaba Psy.D. wrote in Psychology Today about how stress has increased the rate of women’s heart attacks and has increased depression in women.
Pew Research Center study revealed:
“Nearly four-in-ten Americans (38%) list societal factors when asked in an open-ended format to name the biggest challenge for parents today. Among the top specific concerns mentioned are drugs and alcohol, peer pressure, and the impact of television and other media.”
According to the experts, we should reduce unnecessary obligations to minimize stress. By doing this, our kids reap the benefits as well by having high quality, attentive activities.
With research showing drugs and alcohol, peer pressure, in addition to television and media devices being the highest concerns, hence the highest stress triggers, start to reduce those items impact in your life.
Have frequent discussions with your older children about the dangers of drugs and alcohol, creating an open flow of communication. Pick one play date a week and one sport or club to be involved in.
Lastly, reduce television and media time involvement. Have designated places and times for that activity and though it may be a big argument as you transition, in the end, everybody will be happier.
Scary Mommy, a popular mommy blog, wrote:
“Our kids want the best and we, out of guilt and keeping up with the Jones syndrome, often give it to them”
Now, moms know that giving the best to their kids doesn’t involve endless hours on the Xbox or running around like a chicken with their head cut off from activity to activity.
Rest assured that your kids will have everything they need and more when you take the time to choose quality friends and activities sparingly. Being a mom is a tough job, but hands down the most rewarding and highest paying.