Calming Phrases When Tantrums Strike

1. When you want to say “Stop throwing your cars!” Replace it with, “You are showing me you don’t like playing with your toy cars, so would you like me to hold on to them for you?

This is called the speaker/listener technique, according to GoZen, and aids in communicating what your child is feeling without being confrontational.

In addition, this shows what you are seeing from your side of things, and gives your child an opportunity to voice how things seem from their point of view.

You may need to emphasize your perspective a couple times, depending on how involved in their emotions they are but don’t give up on remaining stable.