The walls feel like they are closing in on you when there are toys piled against every wall, dishes filling the sink, and laundry piles that reach the Himalayas.
So you tell your daughter that you will have to read a book with her later, and that after lunch would work better to toss the football with your son.
Sound familiar? Maybe it’s time for our choices to take a turn- and one for long-lasting results!
Children are chaotic, complicated little messes.
But they are also small bodies filled with immeasurable love, changing our lives for the better with every new discovery.
Spending time with our children is the best way to strengthen the parent child bond and let them know that we care about them.
Problem is, it takes, well…time!
The number one thing parents seem to be in short supply of.
Research from Jones (2017), reported by South Dakota University highlighted why spending time with our kids is more than just getting some high-end cuddles in.
Results show that spending “scheduled recurring family time with your children” makes them less likely to have behavioral issues at home or at school.
Do we let our house become a prime time special with bags of unresolved items piled high?
Or that we have to choose between a clean toilet and a life of pulling our kids out of juvenile detention centers?
No!
Sometimes it just means setting aside the endless mommy to-do list and giving our child a little extra TLC when they need it, like Amy Betters Midtvedt did.
Writing for Scary Mommy, Amy tells us how there was one day that clarified her true responsibilities as a mother for her.
Lying in bed was her older daughter, seemingly in a low mood.
Instead of telling her to get up and clean her room or nonchalantly asking her what’s wrong as she whipped around the corner to put the folded towels in the bathroom, she laid down next to her.
This wasn’t some secret op mission to get intel on what was going on deep inside her daughter’s mind, but to just be there for her when she needed some attention from her mother.
Amy writes:
“So she needed me to soothe her tears and rub her back and get her tissues and water and just let her snuggle in next to me so she could sleep and rest.
She needed me to put her before the dishes and the chores and the work and the To Do’s.
She just needed me. What an enormous blessing it can be to be needed.”
Isn’t that the truth!
There are going to be days when your son is so busy with his friends that he barely looks at you as he zips by with his nerf gun (and this happens a lot sooner than any mom would like).
Then there are the days you can’t get the kids off your heels, as they ask for a thousand things before you have a chance to finish a cup of coffee.
Take the needy days as a blessing.
They are all too short.
Resist your compulsory urge to have the floor swept and the toys organized from time to time, and just be in the moment with you children.
Your kids will notice that you chose them- and it will matter- and the dishes will be there waiting for you as always without a minuscule of impact.