Going Through The Ups-and-Downs of Pregnancy? You’re Not The Only One

Pregnancy can be a roller-coaster ride of emotions – with fluctuating hormones, physical changes, and so much to do to prepare, it can be overwhelming at times.

As much as the mom-to-be may be going through physically and emotionally, she is likely not the only one.

Many moms are blessed with the support of understanding family and friends who are willing to help her in any way they can until the blessing of the new baby arrives.  But there is one person who is also experiencing the ups-and-downs that go along with pregnancy, and they are in need of support as well.

The feelings and needs of dads-to-be are often overlooked, but they are often full of questions and concerns and in need of a little TLC as they go through this nine-month journey with their wife.

Romper.com reported on some of the things that dads may be experiencing during pregnancy and what we can do to help:

As pregnant women, it’s important that we remember that our partners are worried about us. There are lots of scary things that can happen, and we’re their priority (whereas we usually put the baby first). We count on our partners to be our rocks, so they can’t always show how concerned they are. But believe me, if they’re involved they’re on pins and needles.

When it comes to pregnancy, most people don’t think about a man’s questions and fears.  When a woman is sick, exhausted, and emotional during pregnancy, it is bound to cause feelings of concern for his wife and baby.

He may be confused and withdrawn a bit due to the unpredictable nature of all the changes his wife is going through.  He may not know how to act with his wife’s crying jags, eating habits, and lack of energy.  Or he may feel that he is suddenly placed in the background as all the attention is on his spouse.

And he is likely not getting as much of his wife’s (or anybody’s) attention as she is consumed with taking care of herself and baby and making all those preparations!

If you are expecting, give a little support to dad.  Keep in mind that he may be frustrated or concerned and wants to feel included.  Ask him how he is doing and that you appreciate his support.  Give him some understanding and encouragement, because it is not easy living with a pregnant woman in the house!

As the non-pregnant individual in the house, partners are often called on to take on more household duties (and rightly so — they’re not the ones growing arms and legs in their off-time). You need to stay away from harsh chemicals and you can’t scoop the litter box, so it’s on them. They don’t get to resent you for any of that, but if you’re like me and the energy you have for showing your appreciation is a little on the low side, they might understandably be a tad bitter.

With the extremes our bodies go through during pregnancy, dad may have to take on more to help.  Not only are you tired and feeling ill, you also can’t physically do everything you used to, like heavy lifting or all the household tasks you may have helped with.  Let dad know that you appreciate the extra effort and that it is all towards the goal of having a healthy baby by allowing you to take care of yourself.

40 weeks is a long time for everyone involved. I’m not taking anything away from the individual who’s actually carrying the child, but I do feel for the people who have to deal with us. This is especially true as we get close to the end and increasingly impatient for baby’s arrival.

Keep in mind the dad-to-be is not experiencing everything you are during pregnancy.  You are feeling the baby grow and move inside you, reading all those pregnancy articles and blogs, and fully absorbed in the little miracle you are carrying.

It may not sink in quite as quickly for dad, and reality may not hit him until the baby arrives.  He may seem irritable or disinterested with all the pregnancy symptoms and conversations that constantly revolve around how you are feeling.

A little patience and understanding can go a long way.  Moms are able to feel the daily changes in their bodies as the baby grows, but it may seem like a long haul to a dad-to-be.  Let him know he is still important to you and vital to the preparations for the little one.

Your baby is real to you as soon as you see that pink line on the stick, but it probably won’t hit your partner until you start showing. But I think that moment must be nothing short of magical for them — when they realize the person they love most in the world is carrying a little person they’ll love more than they ever thought possible.

So let’s give a little leeway to dads-to-be.  Their wives are unpredictable and emotional, consumed with the baby on the way, and getting lots of attention.  Dads-to-be could use a little encouragement and patience themselves.  They have a lot on their minds when their wife is pregnant, and a little support and understanding goes a long way!

Are you expecting or know someone who is?  Do you think dads-to-be get enough support during pregnancy?  Leave us your thoughts in the comments.

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