Women are the most scrutinized group of people on earth!
If it’s not what we are wearing, the way we raise our kids, or the eccentric hair color we experimented with, it is the very shape of our bodies- which is often partly out of our control.
At the very least we should have the support of our loved ones to help combat the constant battle of loving ourselves in any skin we area in- but one woman had to suffer the travesty of having the one she relied on most disappoint her.
The body morphs into unrecognizable shapes, bumps, and curves when a woman has a baby.
It is a constant battle of self-esteem while trying to embrace your new body.
Other mothers are often the only ones to truly understand the hormonal roller coaster you are forced to endure while trying to also find acceptance from your support system.
In a brave moment of maternal heroism one mom rocked her bathing suit at a Memorial Day party with the family at their home pool only seven months after having her daughter.
Putting on a bathing suit after giving birth is a very vulnerable and intimidating experience that you have to slowly work up to; and a family event seems the perfect place to begin.
Or so you would think…
In an AITA thread on Reddit a husband (OP) wanted confirmation that he did the right thing, but the comments were not in his favor.
He shares:
“This Memorial Day, our family decided to have a small barbecue by our outdoor pool. My wife gave birth to our youngest daughter seven months ago, and this is the first time our family has gotten to have fun together.”
My sister (26) and my mother, who are both staying in our guesthouse, came over and brought my six year old nephew… when my wife walks out wearing a bikini.”
When the mother with a baby walks out it reportedly got “awkward” from seeing her in a bathing suit “for the first time.”
AITA for objecting to my wife’s bikini for family pictures? https://t.co/VNhFR267nD pic.twitter.com/AJYWDncqRi
— Am I the Asshole? (@AITA_reddit) May 30, 2020
“Everybody got a full view of her still pregnant looking stomach as well as very wrinkled and leathery looking skin,” the thread read.
What? Really?
“Leathery looking skin” is not how I would explain the beautiful aftermath of where the miracle of life developed.
OP continued to tell his story, saying that his wife went into the pool to play with his nephew when his mom approached him with an unbelievable remark.
“My mom whispers in my ear that a 40 year old woman in a bikini looked tacky,” he says. “And she brings up that my daughter was planning to post a family picture to Instagram.”
OP’s teenage niece was doing what most young people do nowadays and was capturing footage for Instagram Stories and TikTok videos.
The mom continues to use some unacceptable words to describe a post baby body, seemingly forgetting how it was when she had children.
For some unknown reason OP decides it would be a good idea to tell his wife about the whole family being judgmental and negative, rather than supportive and understanding.
The wife didn’t disown the family and refuse to cook dinner for a year so I think she handled it extremely well.
OP explains how it played out:
“I pull my wife aside and ask if she could change into non pool going clothes or a one piece. She flips out at me and starts explaining how this body gave me a precious baby and made a general scene. She then storms off and we end up having to take the picture without her.”
Sadly, this is not the first time she was shamed by her husband.
This was baby number three and apparently during the conversation about the family feeling “awkward” it was brought up how OP wanted her to get a tummy tuck in the past.
How horrible!
All the things OP has done wrong in this scenario is obvious to most people.
He should have been on her side, told his family that it is her home and safe space so they could leave if they were uncomfortable, and that his wife is beautiful despite how flat her stomach is.
One commenter saw all the wrong moves OP did and wrote:
“Yeah super YTA. There is nothing wrong with your wife’s stomach. There is nothing tacky about her swim suit. Want a bikini body? Get bikini, put it on. Done. You and your family was so incredibly disrespectful to your wife.”
Many of the comments were similar, slamming OP for his unsupportive role.
Moms, you are beautiful and powerful!
Our bodies are a canvas of experience and life; and you shouldn’t want to trade it for anything.