When a woman is pregnant, oftentimes people go out of their way to help her – as the sight of a pregnant belly is enough to soften even the hardest of hearts.
There are baby showers, celebrations, and many people asking if they can touch the “baby bump.”
But then a woman has her baby… and right when she needs the most support, it’s as if her entire network forgets she exists.
Having a newborn comes with all sorts of challenges – from figuring out a feeding schedule, navigating breastfeeding challenges, and trying to establish a new routine.
Moms are expected to manage all of this… AND still maintain their typical responsibilities such as caring for their home, preparing healthy meals, and even juggling work for some moms.
With lack of sleep and raging hormones – many moms fall prey to postpartum depression and are overwhelmed at the tasks before them.
And while curious friends are often quick to ask questions like “Is the baby sleeping through the night?” or “How’s the baby doing?” – these well-meaning friends often forget to check on mom herself.
In fact, Parents reports that 1 in 5 moms admit nobody asks how THEY are doing!
It’s as if friends and family forget to acknowledge all a woman goes through to bring a new life into the world…
… like the physical pain of childbirth and the long healing period that comes with it.
Or the raging hormones and emotions flowing through a woman’s body.
Postpartum depression is REAL and it’s even causing some moms to become so anxious and depressed, they’ve considered taking their own lives.
It should go without saying, but there are a few things you should NEVER say to a postpartum mom…
… like commenting on how “tired” they look or how they’ll lose the baby weight in “no time.”
A woman just had a BABY – of COURSE she’s tired!
Instead of unhelpful comments, there are practical things you can do for her that will really make a difference.
Set up a meal train for her, and have folks drop off fresh homecooked meals right at her doorstep.
Even gift cards to delivery services can be helpful during a period when the last thing she wants to do is slave away in the kitchen!
In addition, offer to help her with other practical needs.
It could be something simple like picking up groceries for her, snagging a few baby items she needs, or running other errands.
If she’s comfortable with letting you inside her home, you can even offer to tidy her house, help her catch up on laundry, or watch her other children so she can shower or even just take a nap.
Having a baby is one of the most beautiful things a woman can ever experience, and while it’s fun to celebrate the joy of being pregnant with your friend – she needs you most postpartum.
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