- Be Ready
A natural response to a friend who says they are going through something negative is to support them in a way that you desire to be helped.
When you are sad, you want your friend to come over with a pint of ice cream to hash out all the thoughts in your head.
Come to find out, your friend likes to have some time to herself to work through things, and is lactose intolerant.
So, showing up unexpectedly with something that will give her gastrointestinal discomfort on top of her problems isn’t the right way to show support in that moment.
Don’t be afraid to ask, “How can I support you?” Offer a few suggestions too, like bringing dinner over, sitting together for a movie, or going out for a big dose of retail therapy.
Most importantly, let your friend know that you are there no matter what they are going through, and will be available for support when they need it.
As hard as it is at times, one must remember that no amount of advice or support is going to force change on a friend’s life, they must want it for themselves.
If your friend tells you a situation that they are in that risks their life, or the life of their children, don’t hesitate to contact local authorities. They may be mad at you, but having an upset friend is better than the friend not being there at all.
It can be uncomfortable to bring up personal issues a friend may be having, but bringing problems to light, and showing that you are not just an outside spectator, can be life-saving in more ways than one.
Please let us know if you have a story of when you supported a friend and it turned out to help them more than you thought possible.